a backup

She was a bored certified physiologist

I was just bored watching cartoons

searching for the meaning of life

after years of studying flowers grow

which I had on my bucket list.

Each week, over coffee, we discussed

cracks in my foundation

she offered encouragement

at a cost I could have spent

on a roulette table spin

hoping to win.

So I’ve decided to discontinue

seeking higher power advice

return to my roots of insanity

start watching old westerns, twice

and keep flowers as a backup.