Brushed emotions

brushed emotions

With brushed emotions
I do recall
you’re not God
and I was a fool
to let you
become my everything
and now realize
I should have stepped back
created a distance
because we were not
on the same page.

We were different
yet still the same
but I got caught up
in your disposable game.
Time was the cause
we became the effect
I prepared for the worse
but clinged to the best.
Forever and a day
was not in your playbook
for long.

I discovered what happens
when forever runs out
and that day runs out.
Break-ups are never sweet
like candy
soon bitterness erupts
splashes on the page
and runs, salty, down cheeks.

Sometimes my rage
of you
drags me down
and I feel as though
you used me like toilet paper
to wipe away the guilt
of playing me
and I find myself wanting to
place in words
all the meaningless you gave.

I was in search of something
I knew could not exist
within my heart
but loneliness brought you
to me in some degree
and though the lust
and broken trust
drove me away
I still wanted to say
you created a demon
in my brain
one that walks around playfully.

Now my emotions stroke
the canvas of ill fate
and destiny is placed on hold
until the brighter day
when I’ll stand face to face
with the love of grace
I knew before you.

           12/1/11

4 Comments on “Brushed emotions

burn baby burn

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